Greetings!

This is one of those weeks where I feel like I am drowning. I am having trouble keeping my head above water and it feels terrible. I probably need some help, but I feel like I already have a lot of help. I have a wonderful childcare provider that comes to the house to take care of Matt while I work, I have someone that helps clean once a month and I have a pretty supportive husband. So, I don't need to ask for help, right? Wrong!

This week’s newsletter (and our radio show!) is about Asking for Help. Scroll down to Your Coaching Moment to see how good YOU are at asking for help and how you can be better.

All the best from your coach,
Amy
Founder, Empowered Motherhood LLC

Amy with her son, Matthew

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Amy is the coach and host of a brand new Internet radio show, The Empowered Mother. You can listen live every Thursday from 11am to 12pm pacific standard time on healthylife.net OR check out the show archives anytime.

Join moms and moms-to-be as Amy coaches women on their challenges as women and mothers and celebrates their success. This week’s show is about Asking for Help! If you are interested in being a caller on the show, email amy@empoweredmotherhood.com.

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Asking for Help!

How are YOU at asking for help? What gets in YOUR way? When I work with my clients on this topic there are a myriad of reasons why they don’t ask for help. Here are a few:

"I should be able to do it or KNOW how to do it."
" I’ll look bad."
" I don’t want anyone to know I need help, I want to look like I have it together because everyone else seems like they have it together."
" I will owe something back, I will feel indebted." 
" I feel like I’m a bother - everyone else is busy too."
" It won’t be done the way I want it."
" It never occurred to me to ask for help."

What is your typical reason? What stops you from not only asking for help, but asking for what you want and need? Whatever the reason, a lack of expertise or willingness to ask for help is a handicap as a woman and mother.

The problem is that you CAN’T possibly do everything – it’s never going to happen. And for that matter, YOU can’t do EVERYTHING well. The end result of not asking for help is usually an unhappy mother.

Here are my five tips on improving your ability to ask for help:

1. Remember To Ask! The first tip for asking for help is remembering that it’s your job to ask. It is not your job to imply, hope, or expect the other person to intuit what you need. You don’t even get to guess what his or her answer will be. Your only job is to ask. Just focus on that.

2. Shut up! The second tip is to remember that it’s the other person’s job to say yes or no. Both answers are perfectly all right. Accept them both in advance. If the answer is no, you’re going to ask somebody else or find another creative way of getting your needs met.

3. Start with ‘how.’ Get into the habit of asking how you can get what you need. Be solution oriented. Instead of complaining, wishing or hinting around for something, simply ask out loud, “HOW can I get _______?” Whether you are just asking yourself or someone else, say it just like that.

4. Set the terms. The beauty of asking for what you want is that you can ask for it how, when, and of whom you like. You do this by setting the terms. Decide exactly what it is you want. Be specific. What day? What time? Who do you want to ask?

5. Be ready to receive. Allow this moment to be your chance to receive, knowing that your time to be a giver will come soon enough. Let other people have the joy of giving to you. The only way you can do that is if you offer them the chance.

COACH YOURSELF: I want you to practice asking for help all this week. Pick something that you really need help with and use the 5 tips above. Try it!

Whether you are a brand new mother or have been doing this for years, we are ready to help you!

BUY OUR BOOK! Don’t miss our book Baby on Board! Becoming a Mother Without Losing Yourself: A Guide for Moms-to-Be. The book is designed for moms-to-be but every mom we know is finding a ton of relevance, wisdom and inspiration for themselves. It also is the most hip and soulful shower gift for a friend.

HIRE US AS YOUR PRIVATE COACH! Enjoy the ultimate luxury of having your own personal coach and support system for the biggest challenges in your life. Check out our special packages including the Catalyst and Foundation for Motherhood.

AND listen in to our Internet radio show, The Empowered Mother, on Thursdays from 11am-12pm at healthylife.net or listen to the archives anytime.

Email us anytime at info@empoweredmotherhood.com with questions, suggestions or feedback.

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DISCLAIMER: This newsletter was created to provide information of a general nature and is designed for educational purposes only. If you have any concerns about your health or the health of your baby, you should always consult with a physician or health care professional.